Our children are the best gifts in the world....better than money, that new IPOD I want, getting over lupus, a perfect body (as in one that does not hurt!)...they are the best. They burst on the scene of our lives, whether by natural means or by adoption, and into our hearts and we are smitten, totally and completely. THEN...we spend the rest of our lives attempting to right every wrong that was done to us, trying to create a perfect child, trying to keep all harm from them (and threatening bodily harm to anyone who dares to threaten our child...well, if you are like me!), and then the rest of the time worrying about anything that doesn't fit into an aforementioned category.
What do you do if something DOES happen to a child of yours? What IF they are harmed? What if they are bullied, hurt in a horrible way, beat up at school, unfairly judged by a teacher, left out of a birthday party or clique of friends at school? Where does our Christian grace fit in? Mine? Honestly? I am a knee-jerker...I tend to react quickly and swiftly to anyone who attempts to go after my darlings. Thank goodness I have the opposite for a husband or their would have been many unchristian words burning up cyberspace to the (fill-in-the-blank) teacher, parent, principal, on occasion child, or so on who allowed such travesty to occur. In all honesty, I have become a little mellower in my old (40-something) age, but I still feel that urge to slap open the laptop and start typing.
Okay, lets go a little deeper...what if the offense is CLOSER and more hurtful? AWWWW....these require more than just a non-knee-jerking spouse at your disposal. These are the ones that involve betrayal and lying and cheating...the real stuff of life that puts our Christianity and all that it means to the test. These are the hurts that radically alter our children's lives and radically test our fortitude. Often, these involve people we believed to be trustworthy or safe, or long-time friendships where something goes very, very wrong for the child. Well, I don't need to fill in ANY blanks for anyone who has experienced this level of pain. If you have, you know what I am talking about. But what do we DO..if you are like me...knee-jerking, slap-the-email open, let 'em have it, kind of gal or guy?
I know of only ONE way.... remember....REMEMBER...stop, take a DEEP breath and REMEMBER. I must remember who Christ is, what He came to do, what He did and who I am as a result. Don't get me wrong...I am NOT saying don't feel angry, betrayed, hurt, etc., but I am so responsible for what I DO with those feelings now that I am who I am in Christ. If you are asking the question have we been deeply hurt? Yes, the answer is yes...and many of you have as well...and I am doing by gut-level best to be the woman He wants me to be...Lately, I have been angry...in fact...my feelings run between anger, betrayal, frustration, back to anger.
But if I go back up to the first paragraph and I think about that from the moment these children entered this world and my heart, I became responsible to train them how to be good human beings and the ways of the Lord, and then once they received Christ, how to continue to follow in His ways. I KNOW that THEY take their cues from ME...so much is caught NOT taught!
In this season of joy and peace and comfort, I want to LIVE the best I can If not for ANY other reason then because Christ forgave me, and I want everything I do to reflect what I believe...but please be kind...remember HE was perfect, I am not! I must trust in some situations to let justice run its course and not take it into my own hands. In some cases where action is warranted, it can always be done with a properly merited measure of grace.
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